…an obvious, direct impression

Use the light.
Come home to your true nature.
Don’t cause yourself injury:
This is known as seizing the truth.
  – Lao Tzu

Easwaran gently instructs: “As human beings, we have been born with the capacity to make choices. No other creature has this capacity, and no human being can avoid this responsibility. Every day, whether we see it or not, we have a choice of two alternatives in what we do, say, and think.

These alternatives are: what is pleasant and what is beneficial. The first pleases us now. The second may be unpleasant at the beginning, as anyone who has begun a physical fitness program knows; but it will improve our health and contribute to our peace of mind.

Both choices promise satisfaction. One we get immediately, but it comes and goes; the other requires effort, but its benefits stay with us and often benefit those around us as well.”

Yesterday, I had a doctor’s appointment with Scott Blattman, MD, my physician—a routine physical.

He is a very smart, encyclopedia of knowledge. Usually, I ask him questions, and because I know of his interest in medical IT, we discuss medical technology. Most times, we lightly discuss the fact that I have gained weight and have remained overweight for the past 5-7 years. Usually his conclusion is that— since I exercise regularly-I am doing OK- my vital signs and blood tests, and the resultant lab work have in the past indicated general health and well being.(i.e. Cholesterol levels, blood pressure, PSA indicators)

Not yesterday.

Scott was adamant… my blood pressure had become more elevated, my LDL cholesterol count was slightly higher, and he drove home the conclusion: my persistent weight issue is most likely a contributing factor that is definitely causing a greater risk of heart disease. Now, am I going to DO something about this? or am I going to watch my health deteriorate?

This whole conversation has thrown me into a tailspin. My habits have caught up with me. I have been somewhat conscious of my poor eating habits, but I have pushed that realization back to the back of my consciousness-horizon, and, like Scarlett O’Hara—told myself—“I’ll just think about that tomorrow.”

Well, tomorrow is NOW.

It is time to come face to face with an issue that I have been reticent to confess: “I am guilty of the sin of gluttony.” “I am a glutton.”

There I have said it.

One of the desert fathers of the 3rd century, Evagrius Ponticus stated—and I paraphrase-- that unless a person does not overcome his own gluttony, all other attempts at spiritual formation and growth in wisdom-will be futile.

I am pierced to the quick of my soul.

Like Easwaran says, I have the capacity to make a choice.

Now, what am I going to do about it?