Love him more

The community of the living is the carriage of the Lord.
  – Hasidic proverb

From Sri Easwaran: Where there is so little love that “the carriage of the Lord,” our essential unity, is torn asunder, we must love more. The less love there is around us, the more we need to love to make up the lack.

A man once came to Rabbi Israel, the Ba’al Shem Tov, and said, “My son is estranged from God; what shall I do?” The rabbi replied simply, “Love him more.”

Love him more. Make his happiness more important than your own. This was Easwaran’s grandmother’s approach to every problem, and he says that he knows of no more effective or artistic or satisfying way to realize the unity of life in the world today. It is an approach to life in which everything blossoms, everything comes to fruition. Where there is love, everything follows. To love is to know, is to act; all other paths to Self-realization are united in the way of love.

My wife and I have been struggling with what to do about our son, Porter, who has become estranged from the Lord.

His intense disabilities, bipolar disorder, Asperger’s Syndrome and his lack of successes in college have decimated his self confidence and shrouded his life in depression and a discontented attitude of failure and inaction. He dropped out of college at Texas State in March. He has yet to secure employment of any kind, despite repeated ideas and attempts by both of us to intercede and motivate him.

He sleeps until 11:00am or noon, and generally does not much more than sit in front of the computer and participate in IRC chat and music downloading. But we know he is capable of so much more than this. We have been and are considering evicting him from our home, if he does not find employment soon.

Then this morning, Easwaran’s message of love pierces my heart once more.

In response, in helplessness, I call out to the Lord Himself— “Lord Christ, help me to love, through your Holy Spirit—in spite of my son’s laziness, lack of motivation to work and be productive and his desire to espouse atheist concepts and positions. I know this is not the first time a son has gone this direction, and has caused his parents pain and anguish. You have dealt with such issues before, successfully.

I ask you to protect him in his departure from the way of truth, and through our influence and patience, help to see your Way. I do not have the resources or the wisdom to turn him away from this direction to You…but You have all the wisdom, power and strength to do so. In the name of Jesus the Christ, please help me…and please help Porter. I need your strength, patience and especially your love to overcome this very difficult situation.”

Amen.

 

 

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